During my lifetime, I’ve underexplored two career opportunities that still beckon me.

 

Voice Over Career

 

 

Every time I hear of a voice over audition that I feel certain I could ace, I remember how much fun it was to take voice over classes with Nigel Neale, both in Hollywood and (years later) up here in the Seattle area.

 

I also recall being recruited by a casting director when one of the voice over artists didn’t show up for a scheduled gig at the studio I was working at as a floating secretary.  (This was before I took voiceover classes with Nigel.)

 

I was working in my office when the casting director for the show I was temping for (long-term) came in and asked me to come do a voice over for her.

 

It was quite the shock!

 

I asked, “Me? Why me?!” not hiding my rising sense of panic and inadequacy.

 

She said, “Because I know you can do it, and I’m in a pinch. Every time I walk by this office, I hear a different voice coming out of it, and it’s always YOU!”

 

(Aside: Okay, I’m an expressive communicator. What can I say?)

 

She added, “This isn’t legal, but if anyone finds out, we can Taft-Hartley you in.”  (Whatever the heck that means.)

 

The studio sound booth was just steps away, and there were at least fifteen people in there waiting to do their thing. They needed one more voice.

 

So, there I was, feeling sheepish and probably looking it, too.  (Fraud Alert!  Faux voice over artist in the room!)

 

They ushered me into a small crowd of folks  (professionals all).

 

The people in the sound booth told me my line, which included the words, “Oh! Wonderful!” (I don’t remember the rest of the line, or even if there was more to it than that.)

 

Given the cue, I waited for the line before mine, and then offered a hearty, “Oh! Wonderful!”

 

Full stop. Cut.

 

Oh, crap. I blew it, I thought.

 

One of the fellows in the booth apologized to me.  He said, “I should have given you direction. You aren’t familiar with the script or the characters.”

 

Then he said, “I want you to say the line as if your heart isn’t really in it. You loathe the person you’re speaking to, but you’re  stuck in the wrong place at the wrong time and forced to be polite.”

 

I said, “Ah! OK!”

 

I aced Take Two! 

 

The guy in the booth said, “Perfect!  Great job!  You should do this as a career. You take direction like a dream.”

 

On the way back to the office, the casting director said, “What D. said is true. You should look into voice over as a career. You’d be terrific. And the money’s great!”

 

I went back to work with stars in my eyes.

 

And I did look into it.

 

Back then (early ’90’s), voice over actors got $400 an hour with a guaranteed four hours per gig. If it took less than four hours, they still got the full $1600.

 

It would’ve taken me at least two weeks to make $1600 as a secretary back then!

 

So, I took voice over classes, and it was a total hoot!

 

I became Bugs Bunny, the Little Mermaid, General Patton, a person “addicted” to something that wasn’t truly addictive (for a commercial), and lots of other characters.

 

I had never heard Ariel’s voice (The Little Mermaid) and told Nigel that. He said, “Doesn’t matter. Just look at her and sound the way you think she would sound.”

 

I did so, and he said, “Jeez! You sounded just like her!”

 

And, most notably, Nigel said I had the perfect teenage boy’s voice, which was (and still is) highly in demand in Hollywood and for video games.

 

He said I should move back to Seattle and get into the video game voice over field.

 

I countered, “But I just moved to Hollywood to work in the entertainment industry. Why can’t I get work here?”

 

He said, “Because every voice over wannabe in the world is here trying to get work. It will take five years for someone to even listen to your demo tape. If you go back to Seattle, your break will come sooner.”

 

Well, I was living my lifelong dream of working in Hollywood, so I put the voice over idea on the back burner. And there it has been ever since.

 

Until just yesterday, when I saw a PFLAG post saying that Pixar is looking for a trans teenager for a new role.

 

(It didn’t even occur to me, until just this moment, that I could have had the casting director and the fellows in the sound booth pull some strings for me and fast track a listen to my voiceover demo tape. DUH!!!)

 

When I saw the Pixar audition opportunity, my eyes perked up, and I applied, letting them know I’m not a teenager but I’m trans and I have training as a voice over artist.

 

So, I gave them a shorter version of what I just shared with you.  We’ll see what comes of it, if anything.

 

If nothing, I’ll look into game producers here in Seattle, since I’m back here now.  It might lead to other opportunities, too, and I’ll have a demo tape from the work I do for them (unless I need to come up with one in order to work for them).

 

Stand Up Comedy

 

 

The other underexplored career opportunity is stand up comedy. I know I probably won’t pursue this further, but the two stand up routines I wrote to present at Star Trek conventions went over very well and a producer or talent scout for a TV station in San Francisco actually approached me after I presented “HUSBAND-HUNTING ON THE ENTERPRISE” in Oakland, CA, saying he wanted me to come and reprise it for one of his shows.

 

I balked mightily!

 

I assured him, “My routine won’t fly anywhere but a Star Trek convention.”

 

He said, “Let me worry about that. I will find you a Star Trek audience. Can you do it?”

 

Well…. I had a Super Saver fare and was scheduled to fly back home the next day, and had a friend returning with me on the flight, so that was my “out.” The fellow didn’t offer to put us up overnight or get us another flight.  He just gave me his card and said, “If you’re ever back in this area, give me a call. I want to do this.”

 

Not minutes before, Carolyn Kelley had told me, “Kris, you were wonderful. You sounded like you’ve been doing stand up for ten years!”

 

I didn’t believe her, as nervous as I had been. I thought she was just being kind and supportive of my first foray into stand up.

 

And then along came the professional from the studio in San Francisco.

 

And all my friends in the front row assured me I’d done great.

 

Oakland Convention (Creation)

Denver Convention (Starland)

Baltimore Convention (OktoberTrek)

(“…and what about Vulcan foreplay?

I waited seven years for this?!?”)

(Husband Hunting on the Enterprise comedy routine, now available in

DeForest Kelley Up Close and Personal: A Harvest of Memories from the Fan Who Knew Him Best)

 

So, I presented the routine (and one other) at two more Trek conventions, in Denver and in Baltimore.

 

And that was the end of that…

 

I’ve considered doing it again locally, but I just can’t get up the nerve.  (Writing is show business for shy people.)

 

I can get up the nerve to do voice over work because it’s booth-bound. It isn’t a public presentation before hundreds or thousands of people. (I know it’s created for millions of people, but I don’t have to look at them to do it!)

 

I have managed to appear at conventions  to talk about DeForest Kelley (but not without weeks of anxiety beforehand), and I’m fine doing interviews and podcasts by phone or ZOOM.  And once I get out the starting gate at conventions and spend a couple minutes interacting with De’s fans, I do fine at those, too.

 

But I was raised to be “seen but not heard” so it’s quite the leap outside my comfort zone to step out on a stage or before any kind of audience and spend time informing or entertaining them.  Again, I’m always okay/good to go after a few minutes, but up until then, I’m a nervous wreck.

 

Writing, I love.  No pressure, no stress.

 

Voice over, I love. (A little pressure, a little stress.)

 

Live interviews/podcasts, I like. (A little pressure, a little stress, but not for long.)

 

Live appearances… YIKES!  But I’m always glad, afterward, that I did them.

 

Being scared once in a while while doing something worthwhile is a good way to acquire courage!