I think I’m finally over the hump. I’m feeling better emotionally.
It was probably a combination of things that caused my malaise:
- Politics – Election 2024 (perhaps most prominently)
- Money concerns
- Post-COVID exhaustion
- Dearth of exercise up until recently
- Sick pets
THE FIX IS IN
- I’ve started walking again every day. That helps boost my “happy hormones.”
- I’ve talked to several friends recently (in person and via phone or video chat).
- I will be getting a brochure writing job soon.
- I have finished three writing/editing/enhancement tasks for a long-time client (which she LOVED)
- Mr. Tumnus is looking and feeling better, now that the weather is warming. He is gaining his weight back and getting back at Tillie head-butting-wise (Tillie is a little spitfire: tiny but tenacious!), which is always a good sign of recovery!
THE EXTENDED TIME OFF AS A PAID WRITER HAS ACTUALLY BOOSTED MY SKILL
I’ve noticed that when I do get an assignment now, my heart is so happy that my mind just explodes with ways to make the communication special — special as far as making a genuine heartfelt connection with whoever will be reading it. It’s like my senses have been honed. In other words, the communication is sharper, clearer, cleaner, and more relational than ever before.
I used to fret I’d get “rusty” if I stepped away from constant writing. Turns out I get BETTER! That’s good to know. It makes me feel more secure, for sure!
The accompanying graphic, to me, isn’t about masks per se. It’s about what’s hidden beneath the masks, our actual feelings. I can smile and look like I don’t have a care in the world even when I’m feeling completely deflated. But I don’t want to do that anymore. I usually want to isolate so I don’t inflict my malaise on anyone else, because we’re all fighting battles that no one else knows anything about, usually. But by expressing it, we suddenly discover that other people truly care about us and usually don’t mind sitting with us through our malaise, offering comfort and insights, since they’ve “been there, too.”
I was raised my a stoic mother and a ballistic father. It was quite the contrast! It has taken me a lifetime to find the middle road between the two. But it’s a good place to be. I know that I will outlast any malaise or misfortune that comes my way. I just have to wait it out. Tomorrow always brings new perspectives and opportunities. No one is truly stuck in Groundhogs Days (one day just like the next, nothing ever gets better or worse) unless they decide to stay there because of some kind of psychological payoff they’re getting.
Things change regularly. That’s good news, most of the time; it gives us the chance to adapt and learn to survive and thrive under changing conditions. The fewer Groundhog Days I experience, the better because I like to believe that I’m always growing and learning something new.
What I learned this time was “name your pain and concern.” Feel it and express it. People will care, and they will help in any way they can as long as you let them. And just knowing that works wonders. The pain gets shared, dispersed, mellowed. You feel virtual arms all around you.
It’s wonderful.
Thank you, Friends!
