My Conversation with a Cat

September 26, 2023

“Ouch!!! Keep your tony nails to yourself, will you?!”

 

Miss Kitty sat up from her breadbox position near my armpit and leaned back a little, mulling it over.

 

Her face clouded over, perplexed.

 

My “OUCH!!!” had been automatic and loud. It had unsettled her some. (Not anything I ever want to do to a fellow creature, animal or human.)

 

I’m sure she wondered what, exactly, she had done wrong.

 

So, I explained — far more gently this time.

 

“Honey, I have wimpy skins compared to you. I know you did that to your mommy and that you like to do that to other kitties, but they have tough skin and thick fur, like yours.” (Yes, I said tony nails and wimpy skins; these were not typos. I speak to critters less grammatically than I speak to humans. It’s part of my foreign language dialect, you see? Since I don’t speak fluent cat, dog, goat, chicken or any other species  — try as I might! — I figure they won’t notice when I mangle my own.)

 

She relaxed a  little as my usual affection for her returned to my larynx.

 

“I’m sorry I yelled, sweetie. It just hurt.”

 

She reassumed the breadbox position. I petted her and assured her I love her and all was forgiven.  A tentative purr let me know she was feeling better about our “misunderstanding.”

 

“Thank you for wanting to knead me. Very sweet and thoughtful of you, actually.”

 

Miss Kitty probably thought, “What’s he yapping about now?” and then decided, “No matter. The love is back in his voice. It’s all good.”

 

It’s always good to try to figure out what a critter is communicating when it does something to you.  In this instance, Miss Kitty intended to massage and soothe me, not to impale me.

 

It’s all good!

 

 

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